So Smart!

Ruth was working on a new puzzle. Lots of fun for her, and even more fun for me. Because now, puzzles come with running commentary: a tiny window into the workings of her amazing little mind.

“I need Jolly Roger’s other eye. Where is Jolly Roger’s other eye? Where is it? Is that it? No. Is this it? YES! YES! I found Jolly Roger’s other eye! I DID IT!

I am so smart. And so strong…

Now I need the castle.”

At what point do we stop being willing to say things like that? I was taught not to talk about being smart, or strong. To be modest, to show humility. But I didn’t just learn not to say it. I learned not to think it. I recently crashed and burned when a job interviewer asked “What strengths and skills do you think you would bring to our organization?” (I know, a question out of nowhere… who could have anticipated that?!)

I want to keep that voice in her head for as long as possible. Sure, she should probably learn that there are times to keep those thoughts to herself. But I want so much for her to keep thinking them. That’s my ongoing challenge, as a parent.  And I want that voice back in my own head- at least during job interviews.

My response in the moment?
“And brave. Don’t forget brave.  You are so smart and so strong and also very brave.”