Ow! OW! it HURTS!

February 11, 2010 at 10:19 am 5 comments

My Lenten Study, Feasting and Fasting: Living Abundantly in a Dieting World, is forming up. I’m really excited about it– about the content, about putting out there in front of people who know me the same sort of stuff I’ve been writing anonymously for 2 years, about learning how to use Powerpoint, the whole she-bang.

The downside is that the structure of the study- in which I invite people to consider a text from popular culture that speaks about the body in contrast to a text from Scripture that speaks about the body- demands a certain amount of “research” into texts from popular culture.

I have put myself in a position where I am reading Women’s Magazines for work.

I was never really a fan before finding FA, and even less so now. But the first mag I picked up to browse through hurt my head so badly, I’m not sure I can go back.

At least I was able to find it online, so I can grab screenies to use in the study. I think I would have cried a little if I’d spent money to have access to gems such as:

Prevent Love Chub
That’s right, ladies. We know it takes a skinny girl to get a man, but once she’s got him, how can she prevent all that weight gain that comes from being in his vicinity? The brain-breaker came last.

The Problem? too much happy. But fear not, we have a fix for that
That’s right Laydeez. you might be too happy. But the solution is easier than you think; weigh yourself more.

You’re Happy
Research shows that what’s good for your heart may be bad for your hips. A study published last year in the journal BioPsychoSocial Medicine found that happy people were less likely to succeed at losing weight than those with a “slightly negative and cautious outlook.”

The fix: Weigh in often. It’s great to accept your body and not obsess over every last calorie, but it’s hard to feel good about yourself when none of your pants fit. To prevent your eating habits from spiraling out of control, Miller-Kovach recommends regular weigh-ins. “Studies have shown that once you pass the five-pound mark, weight gain can take off like a runaway train,” she says. Seeing the scale creep toward that mark can be a call to action. Still need convincing? Women in a Duke University study who lost as little as 10 percent of their body weight reported dramatic improvements in the bedroom. “Research shows that people who are more active and happier with their bodies have more satisfying sex lives,” Ward says. If that’s not motivation, we don’t know what is.

Hop on that scale more often to ensure you maintain that elusive slighly negative outlook. Actually, if you get really successful at the self-loathing, maybe you can convince him that he’s unhappy in this relationship, too. And then you won’t have to worry about the Boyfriend Layer any more. WIN!


Entry filed under: Incarnational.

When the Sartorial meets the Sacerdotal Fasting

5 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Bri  |  February 11, 2010 at 11:22 am

    Wait, wait…..

    Logic of this paragraph of the “article” (I don’t know that I want to respect it with the term):

    1. You’re fat because you’re happy and have a good self-image.

    2. You need to fix this by becoming less happy with yourself.

    3. You then will have the drive to lose weight, and become happier with yourself again.

    4. People who are happy with their bodies have better sex.

    Why can’t we just jump from 1 to 4 – you’re happy with your body, and you’re probably having good sex, too!

  • 2. Mina  |  February 11, 2010 at 1:30 pm

    The logic fail in that article is astounding, and inadvertently exposes the diet industry’s main strategy. “Make the fatties feel bad about themselves!”

    You know what I do when my jeans don’t fit? I buy new jeans. I don’t go into a hate spiral with my body until I have starved myself back into them.

    Do people really think this way?

  • 3. Twistie  |  February 11, 2010 at 3:10 pm

    (criez and criez)

    You know what? I’m fat. Mr. Twistie, while not as fat is not precisely skinny himself. We’ve managed to get from points 1 to 4 sans any body loathing or weight loss.

    I don’t see any reason why I should manufacture body hate for my own good. If I hate my body, then I don’t love myself because my body is me. If I love my body, then I treat it well. I give it food that nourishes it, move it with joy, and appreciate its strengths. That’s what I call living well and loving myself.

  • 4. Amanda  |  February 11, 2010 at 3:22 pm

    Yep, the magazines are TEH CRAZY! I was flipping through one recently that listed “Mistakes you could be making at the gym” – one of which was using a bike for all your cardio…you know, because then your thigh muscles will get too big, and muscles=fat=unsexy, apparently. I had to put the magazine down and take a walk to cool off at that point.

  • 5. Mulberry  |  March 9, 2010 at 3:17 am

    Then why don’t people feel bad when their jeans don’t fit because they lost weight? (Rhetorical question.)

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